jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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