so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
