so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
Randomize
