Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
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