I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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