she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
Randomize
