..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
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