I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
