saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
