I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
