It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Randomize