You just made me feel so damn special
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
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