South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Can you bring me the toilet please
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
