I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize
