ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
