We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
