How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
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