hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
