I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
