Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i think i have herpe
just one?
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Randomize
