I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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