Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
there is another microwave in the elevator.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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