the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
