Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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