I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Randomize
