Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
