you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
sick fucks of a feather flock together
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize