You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
