I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Hippo gnu deer
oh awks just saw the head of medical staff who I punched the bottle of wine at
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
