okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
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