I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
rethinking that breast reduction surgery... i'm tired of drunkenly explaining the scars to guys who don't really give a shit
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Randomize
