Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Randomize