his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
