First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
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