I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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