it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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