I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Where'd you go last night?
Don't EVER let me photobomb a group of lesbians again. They made me their "straight mascot" and I ended up singing Donna summer tunes for beers at their apartment complex.
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
