You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
