tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
