Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
