Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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