Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
