dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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