my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
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