Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Randomize
