Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
