I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
