She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
