hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
People in love make me want to vomit
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
pray to the hookup gods
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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