I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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