she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
A bitchslap is in order.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
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