just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
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